Most Welcoming

About two years back, Anees Bazmee virtually rose from the dead to give us a surprise hit in the form of No Entry. Taking us back into the David Dhawan-esque comedy of the 90s and resurrecting the comic streak in a fine Anil Kapoor, the film was lapped up by the audiences and critics alike. Now Bazmee returns with the much-publicized Welcome, his take on the 1999 Hugh Grant starrer Mickey Blue Eyes. Interestingly, the film also has shades of another recent Mallika Sherawat release, Shaadi Se Pehle (opposite Akshaye Khanna).

After feeling somewhat bombarded by the hype and publicity surrounding the film, I was a little hesitant that high expectations may result in sore disappointment. In fact, as the first 15 to 20 minutes passed in front of me and very few laughs were had, that sinking feel began to make its present felt. Why did the jokes seem so contrite? Could the ever-so-reliable Akshay Kumar/Paresh Rawal team truly be running out of steam? Maybe director Bazmee was so keen on repeating his previous success that he got carried away this time around.

Until...

Suddenly, along came a scene where Anil literally stops traffic to...paint. I sat up and took notice of a rather humorous exchange between Anil and Akshay, only for almost everything that followed to turn downright hilarious. At one point, I almost wondered if I was watching two entirely different films.

I'll not delve into the plot itself, as most of it is made available through the previews, and the twists are worth seeing for yourself. All one can say is God Bless Nana Patekar. And the aforementioned Kapoor. Both Nana and Anil are what make Welcome everything that it is. Their inane gangsters are probably the most likable characters in the entire film, and yes, they are the same people who kill for a living and ruthlessly force Akshay into an engagement with Katrina. To turn these train-wrecks of people into the more appealing of the lot shows true skill, especially given the fact that they evoke the most thunderous laughter of all. Hats off to Nana, in particular, for playing a character so out of the norm from his usual work and doing so with flying colors. The audience truly lapped up almost his every word and movement.

Of course, both Nana and Anil are ably supported by Akshay and Paresh, both veterans of the "leave-your-brains-behind" humor bracket. Akshay is superb in the first half as the seedha man of principals he portrays, and his shyness around Katrina is both humorous and endearing. Paresh takes his most applauded character to date - that of Baburao from Hera Pheri and mixes him with his stubborn turn in Cheeni Kum. Sadly, both he and Akshay are relegated to the background for a lot of the second half, but since Nana and Anil are quite on top of their game, you don't mind too much.

Katrina looks absolutely stunning, but she is given very little to do other than add the glamor quotient. And after dubbing her own lines in Namastey London and Apne earlier this year, she's back to having her voice dubbed for her. Granted it's the familiar voice that we now associate with the actress, but it would be nice to see her using her own voice after having been around for a couple of years now. Mallika is actually given more meat to show off her funny side, and she does a fair job of it. Although she really is just there as the quintessential sex bomb, and the males around me in the cinema seemed most appreciative.

Feroz Khan is his wacky self. Sometimes one can't but wonder if he is for real, but by now we're used to his queer on-screen persona. Whoever plays his son sure grates on the nerves (even if he is supposed to in the film, at times it's a little unbearable).

If the overall humor and performances lift the films, the length and music drag it down. As said earlier, the film takes its sweet time to pick up. People who rent it on DVD would risk switching it off and missing the revelry that follows once all the characters have been introduced. Also, the last 20 minutes turn into pure Priyadarshan mayhem. And this is not a Priyadarshan film. It gets bad to the extent that you wish you were watching at home with a fast-forward option at hand.

Himesh Reshammiya's music is god awful. The title track is probably the most catchy simply because it graces the TV every five or so minutes on every other Indian channel. Hoth Rasiley
is the most interesting and elevated by Malaika Arora-Khan's sensuous appearance. Much to the audience's dismay, the first song we are subjected to is the agonizing Kola Laka Vellari, for which even Google is yet to come up with an explanation. It's tortuous so much so that I heard groans from various sectors of the screening room. Fortunately, the remainder of the songs are shot keeping the comedy alive, hence it is a riot to watch Anil and Nana's antics in insha'Allah and Kiya Kiya.

Essentially, it's a brainless film with all the wit in the world. It is absolutely incredulous and yet leaves you in hysterics more often than not. Some sluggish pacing at the start and end plus inferior music is not enough reason to not go see the film, and Anil and Nana alone are enough reason to go have a look.

Verdict? Worth your RSVP.

Things Best Left Forgotten

The Priyadarshan/Akshay Kumar/Paresh Rawal has been alive and kicking since Hera Pheri proved an unlikely success seven years ago. Somewhere along the way, a Rajpal Yadav was thrown into the mix, and along came a progression of films ranging from hilarious to reasonably funny to downright awful. The team's latest offering, Bhool Bhulaiyaa, sadly falls into the latter category, making one wonder...should this team just give it a rest?

There's no point in getting into the story, because there isn't really a coherent one as such. Priyadarshan, much to our dismay, seems to have taken a leaf out of Ram Gopal Varma's book and opted to make his own comedy/horror flick, a la Darling. Perhaps someone should have informed Priyadarshan of Darling's unfortunate fate (and the pain it inflicted on the few of us who actually watched it)...

Actually, let me take that back. Before delivering the slightest warning on how RGV is no longer a source for inspiration, someone should have informed Priyadarshan that you should never, not even in your wildest dreams, cast Amisha Patel in your film. Her wrath remains unbearable, and her acting capabilities remain non-existent. One wonders how she even managed to get the role given this is not a Vikram Bhatt production...yes, that was most definitely an intentional innuendo...

As if casting Amisha was not enough, Priyadarshan then decides that he will not introduce Akshay until nearly the intermission. So every one's favorite comic boy is very much absent from the first hour of the film, if not more...subjecting us to more tears than laughs. And lo and behold, as soon as Akshay emerges from whatever hiatus that was, the film picks up and shows slight promise.

And that is when the director mixes in the RGV influence and decides to shoot for some lousy combination of The Exorcist and ...Dumb and Dumber? Yes, I was confused, too.

No folks, this is not a remake of any known film...it's just a horrid mixture of one too many genres. Hell, there's even a love triangle in there.

Oh, and wasting Akshay's talent was not enough ...Priyadarshan opted to sign on two of the most promising new kids on the block, Shiney Ahuja and Vidya Balan, was tarnish the reliable reputations they so carefully built with their first few films. (And, of course, there's Paresh Rawal who can only watch the proceedings and probably wonder what he's even doing in the film in the first place).

There's a nice tune or two...Labon Ko is the only one you vaguely remember after the debacle you were made to witness.

Priyadarshan, where did we go wrong with you? First Phir Hera Pheri, then Dhol and now this? Why don't you go back to making another Virasat? It looks like you've milked your comedies for all that they're worth.

Verdict? Best...Left...Forgotten

A Spoonful of Sugar

While it is quite common to hear people argue that Mr. Amitabh Bachchan is now overexposing himself by appearing in one too many films, one cannot help but deny that there is still an element that draws you into watching him on-screen. Indeed, he will always be one of the finer Indian actors, and that is precisely why it is hard to resist a film that pairs him with one of the country's finest actresses, Tabu.

Touted as "A Sugar Free Romance", Cheeni Kum is precisely that. A film that, without the conventional hero/heroine, college campus setting and barrage of background dancers, tells the simple tale of how two individuals share a couple of chance meetings and proceed to fall in love. Only there is no real declaration of their love - no shouting from rooftops or pouring buckets of tears while mouthing the standard 'Main tumse pyaar karti hoon' shannanigans - but a simple mutual admiration that develops over time.

The catch is that these protagonists share an 30-year age gap (Bachchan is said to be 64 and Tabu, 34). Bachchan works as a scrooge-like head chef at "Spice 6", the top Indian restaurant in London, while Tabu frequents his joint and teaches him a thing or two about real zafrani pulao. All the while, they are surrounded by a wise-beyond-her-years cancer-striken child (Swini Khera), a bumbling kitchen staff, Bachchan's Sex and the City-obsessed mother (Zohra Sehgal) and Tabu's drama queen of a father (Paresh Rawal).

What works for the film is the fact that each individual enacts his or her role with utmost ease. Yes, we could have gone a lifetime without having to witness Bachchan shop around a drug store for contraceptives, but the truth is that he is good in any role he takes on. This is also an uncharacteristically understated performance from the senior, complete without the echoing baritone voice and piercing looks we are so used to.

Tabu interprets her role with the perfect element of sarcasm and wit. It's a shame we don't see more of her, and it really is a loss to the industry that they do not give her the credit she deserves. After The Namesake, she continues to show why she is one of the best in the business.

Fans of Paresh Rawal who enjoy him at his over-the-top, Hera Pheri best will be disappointed that this is not such a role. He does have moments of humor, but his purpose is more to provide conflict in the otherwise casual love story.

Newcomer Swini Khera is very impressive as the smart-talking child. It's nice to see Indian filmmakers finding less annoying children of late (other welcome additions include Ali Haji from Fanaa/Ta Ra Rum Pum/Partner and Angelina Idnani, also from Ta Ra Rum Pum). Zohra Sehgal is just right for her role.

The music dominates the background and is not really something you pay much notice to, even if it does sound reasonably ear-pleasing.

Of course, there is a downside. At times the film fails to hold your interest. You find yourself flipping through a magazine or getting up to grab something from the kitchen - in other words, it's no film that you feel the need to give your 100% attention to.

Also, there is an overall feeling that something is missing from the film. It's one of those ventures where you don't really feel like you're watching a film. It's almost like watching an hour of Eastenders ...

Nonetheless, it's something different - not at all to be compared with Nishabd, another recent film that paired him with a significantly-younger actress, as the two films are poles apart in terms of theme and content.

Verdict? What harm can a little sugar do?